Mindfulness, Relationships

Is Football Ruining Your Relationship?

It’s just about Fall and that means football season is right around the corner.  For some, that means football will take over there televisions and their lives for several months.  For others, it’s just Fall and instead of football, they have apple picking and other fun activities planned.  For me, it’s a mix of both.

When football season starts,  I feel like it’s football, football and more football in my house.  My husband is on four…yes, FOUR, Fantasy Football leagues and that means football is on in our house almost 24-7.  I like to say that in the fall, we have football on our television Sunday, Monday and sometimes Thursdays and Saturdays.  It’s crazy, right?!  It’s like an obsession.  And it got me thinking the other day…how much do I actually see my husband during the Fall?  The answer might not be what you think.

During the Fall, we don’t necessarily have a ton going on.  That means some peace and quiet…and football.  In our home, football isn’t a priority, but it’s important.  It’s important because my husband loves it.  He loves the game, talking about it with his friends and staying up-to-date with the players.  And because he loves it, I like it.  No, I’m not in love with football but it is fun to watch.  Mainly because I’m with my husband.  So during the Fall, I do see my husband.  Quite often, in fact.  But that’s because I plan to be with him while he’s watching the game.

But some days I wonder…is football ruining my relationship because it takes over my life?  Some days, I think the answer is definitely yes.  Then other days, I’m not so sure.  Let me break it down for you.  If I said, Yes, football is ruining my life because…” the sentence could finish with it takes up so much time or I can’t watch my show or my husband gets to relax while I’m doing housework like crazy.  I could allow football to ruin my life and become a time suck or something that I dread every week.  If I thought about it this way, it would become a negative space in my life.  It would become something I hated.  It may even become something I resented my husband for.  If that happens, then football essentially creates a void in our relationship.  Our relationship would become strained.  If allowed football could, in fact, ruin our relationship.

On the other hand, if I said, “No, football isn’t ruining my life because…” the sentence could finish with it’s fun to watch the game and cheer on my team or I get to relax with my husband and settle down for a bit or we get to visit with friends every Sunday.  If I decide to go down this path of thought, then I see football as a positive thing.  As something that my husband and I can share together.  Football then becomes something we enjoy and have fun with.  It becomes a positive activity in our life that allows us to spend time together, gives my husband the opportunity to teach me about the game and the players and let’s us share the experience of watching the games with our friends and family.  Down this path, football could improve our relationship.

Your sentences could be very different than mine.  But the choice of whether you let it ruin your life is a choice that only you can make.  Before the season officially starts, do some deep thinking and decide how you want the game to affect your life and your relationship with your partner.  You could even have a conversation with your partner about how you want the season to go.  My advice will always be to take the high road and go for the fun, positive route.  Enjoy your time with your partner while watching the game and try not to worry so much about the other things you have to do.  Just be together and enjoy each other’s company.  And of course…GO PATS!

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